Resource To Life

In my online adventures, I recently stumbled upon a very informative resource for parents of troubled teens. LA Talk Radio has Dore Francis hosting a radio show for troubled teen help. The show has many guests from all over the troubled teen industry such as directors of residential treatment facilities, wilderness camps for troubled teens, and also counselors and psychologists who work with teens on a daily basis.

At their website you can learn about Dore Francis’s past as an educational consultant for helping parents of struggling teens. You will also see an archive of all of her shows which are packed full of past interviews filled with parenting information.

Dore Francis is on the radio show live, every Monday at 12:00pm (PST). I highly recommend listening to some of the archived shows.

One interview that I listened to recently had Scott Jones as a guest. Scott Jones is the program director for Turnabout/Stillwater Academy. Stillwater Academy is treatment program for troubled teens. Surprisingly, Scott began his work with troubled teens as a volunteer, and his responsibilities grew from there. They talked about how parents are really involved in their teens therapy and growth in the Academy.

One foundational question to this interview was “What are the strongest indicators that an out-of-home program will help a troubled teen?” Scott answers those questions and much more in the archives. The interview with him aired on Monday, August 10, 2009. Be sure to listen to a show or two, and I hope they help you more in your parenting growth.

Children wake up and find themselves battling between being an adult, and still being a child. This contributes to the child’s problem behaviors, especially as they are feeling lost during their development. You might be experiencing moments where your child wants adult privileges, yet they’re unable or unwilling to accept responsibility for those adult privileges.

These five areas are where all children develop. These are areas of change that will take place in your child as they grow into an adult.

The 5 areas of change, that might contribute to your child’s problem behaviors are…

1. Physical – All children eventually develop physically. For some this happens early, and for others they bloom later on. During this stage, your child, pre-teen, or teen will become capable of reproduction, and they will more than likely experience a large growth spurt. For girls, menstruation may start at this time, and for guys, they will begin “noticing” the female race. It’s important that parents be involved during this stage in an effort to guide and coach through these changes. It’s even a great idea to let your child know that this will happen to them. Let your child know what to expect.
2. Emotional – The transition from childhood to adulthood can be full of emotion because the child is striving to leave behind their childhood mindset, and grow into their adult mindset. Their journey of discovering themselves, on top of academic and athletic pressures, will be full of emotion as they learn of their identity.
3. Abstract, Not Concrete – As the brain develops, children growing into adults will begin to think abstractly, not concretely. Concrete thinking does what one is told, abstract thinking wants to know why. Abstract thinking produces more questions in an effort to understand more about one’s choices. At this stage, it’s imperative that teen’s learn values such as problem solving, self-control, and how to respond positively to negative situations. If a child doesn’t learn problem solving and self-control, the development of their abstract thinking and reasoning could lead to more serious problem behaviors in the future.
4. Social – Your child will want to have more involved relationships. Sure, your child has friends, but in this area they will want to become closer and more intimate. In this area, teens usually feel that their friends understand them, not their family. This stage or area of change is usually filled with the romantic or dating relationships.
5. Moral – In relation to abstract thinking becoming the more dominant way of thinking, teens should now be capable of determining the right decision in a moral dilemma. Their thinking will begin to encompass more than just themselves as they discuss the world, and issues going on around them. They will begin to believe in things that you might not, and they might begin to support political or scientific movements that you do not.

Just remember, these areas of change are normal and happen to every child. Because of all of the change, you might see some of your child’s problem behaviors more often than before. Be patient, and continue to parent them through these changes. The changes take years to fully develop, and teens normally turn back around once they enter adulthood.